Sunday, December 9, 2007

Am I alone??

This thought was haunting me during last 2-3 days in college. For the first time, I felt loneliness in my class room.

Last monday or tuesday I told one of my friends(not in that serious mood) that I was getting bored. She in a surprise exclaimed "Priya getting bored in this class!! That won't happen". I replied nothing.

The fact is, even though our whole class is a one single union, there are kutti kutti gangs in our class. As far as I'm concerned, I'm a member of all gangs. I used to run around and disturb the discussions (if any) in all groups. I don't want to get tied up among one group of friends.

But... I dont know what happened to me last week (Or what happened to others). I felt that I didn't have the citizenship of even one gang. Now I'm wondering what all thoughts I had in my mind last week..

Majority of my friends(whom I consider as good friends) are not in the same range of frequency of my thoughts. I'm ready to get tuned to their frequency. I'm ready to get shifted up or down. But many are not willing to do that... etc...etc.. like that a lot of useless conceptions I had. A couple of incidents in the class forced me to think so. To be frank, I felt - I'm alone locked in a secluded cottage of boredom.

Last friday, I was actually desperate thinking all these. My mind and thoughts were soo cloudy with many misconceptions(??). Many of my friends could find my change of mood. Even some of them asked me 'why are you mood off?' I didn't have any proper answer. But, 2/3 of them could guess the reason too. Even now, there is some blurdness in my mind. I know my classmates will read this and ask me.. But I dont have any clear cut answer.

After this, had a small chat with a friend regarding this. He asked me not to go for such insane thoughts and told me the fault is with my mind . Might be correct.. no.. it should be correct. May be because of the climate change :)

How can I be alone in my OWN class!! I've heard that some of the VIP's have dual citizenship. Like that, I believe I'm having multi citizenship :) How is it possible for everyone to have parallel thoughts!! Everyone will be having their own identity, views, thoughts and concepts.. right??

Now, I'm thinking why should I put this as a blog post. Anyway, I wrote this much.. and all these are the thoughts which churned my mind a lot. No injustice in giving you all a chance to read this.. is there?? But I'm telling you again, this is not a clear reflection of my mind. But, a blurd reflection!!

Signing off,

PS: I wrote frankly the conceptions I'd in my intellect. Not claiming that all are true. But I wish those all were some misunderstanding from my part.


Sandeep Sadanandan said...

kaivittu poyallo!


Devidas said...

innu shariyaakitharam classil!!

Ramakrishnan said...

please dont feel such things.... and do tell us if you feel lonely

Hailstone said...

Oh God!! What a reponse I got after this post. In the morning itself, almost all my friends knew about this and they didn't let me to sit alone even 1 minute. Almost all the time minimum 2 were with me as bodyguards telling -"Priyaye ottakkakaruthu..." (for teasing me)
I'm really happy now :)


Anonymous said...

chumma internettil vedi pottichal itra response...
appol karyamaayitaanu ingane thoniyirunnathengilo??
veruthe number erakaadhe maashe... nammal eee kali kore kandatha!!


Hailstone said...

@ Anon,
"PS: I wrote FRANKLY the conceptions I'd in my intellect. Not claiming that all are true."

I don't want to convince others. Nobody except you, anon, suspected like this.

Btwn, I know who this anon is.

Note: I don't used to give much importance to anonymous comments.

Anonymous said...

enne veruthe vittek mashe...
i respect your feelings.
but as you may realised by now... it was not true that class is boring!
plus more fun coming up with record submissions and lab internals and university exams of 4rd year!! wish you have a wonderful not- boring year ahead!!

Mr. Anonymous
(the affectionate stranger!)

Anonymous said...

"i meant 3rd sem"
Mr. Anonymous
strikes again!!

Rohith said...

"...I'm alone locked in a secluded cottage of boredom..."

That dialogue struck me hard... It simply increases the depth of ur words beyond ur thoughts.. Good entry..
One tip... While writing about these kinda think-o-topics which are more non-day to day things, please do make a copy in black n white, think over these topics over n over and write as many things as u can with ur pen , then complie all the best thoughts with a very good vocabulary and present it.. u wud surely get good appreciation...

: Reason I mentioned coz u hav begun every thing very beautifully(highly imaginative).. cud make it very much better, bcause I know u havent spent much time over this entry...

Hailstone said...

Thankyou, Rohith.

ej said...

to start wid, this conection of mine spoiled a reply(which i felt's very good) of i gotta write all over again.anywayz its a pleasure ta do it for u.. ha ha :D

first of all, nice post..good language, some nice twisting of the vocabulry here n there, one thing that requires special appreciation is the selection of topic. U've put into words feelings, (which i belive) many of u have felt one time or the other. to b frank, i've felt it amny a times. eventhough not the gang stuff, suddenly feelin aloof frm d most closest frnds is not a pleasent one, though for no reason of them at most times n not so st certain times.

rather than boring, lonely is the word more apt i think. n as rohit mentioned, "struck in the lonely cottage of boredom", simply superb. u can really consider publishing a dictionary consisting of such indigenous phrases whic i'm sure many would appreciate.

n i think u feeling alone has got nothin to do wid ya frnds? having sucah a wonderful 60+ frnds in class n they let u feel alone means they did a hell of a job pulling it off.. loz..

n for a comment i think it'll suffice. it's more like a pst.. running into paragraphs... ;)

it's enuf i guess.. once again nice work..
hope u can come up wid such aff the baet yet chartbuster articles again.

blogs are where u let out urself run wild. i dont think editing and rewriting an article has much to do ther,like once i had told devi himself. express urself as u r, wat u are. in an effort to cook up the best article, dont loose ur original thoughts and feeling. because without them it's all jus another piece of crap.

Anonymous said...

congratulation, u raised to the standard of vinuannan.

Rohith said...

ya maybe EJ has a point, I shall consider.. but I never meant to say revise ur thoughts... see man, we are born malayalees... English is not our forte.. very les among us wud have the very apt words we intended to express in our first go.. Maybe juz the first time u re-read it, u will feel.." oh I cud hav written it this way or that way.."
Thats all I meant.. hope its clear..

Anonymous said...

Mr. anonymous here
i'm not the lsst anonymous who posted the comment :)
do not mistake....
Mr. Anonymous
(The Flabberghasted Stranger!!)

Ramakrishnan said...

i am really amused to see such response...... and Mr anonymous please do comment at my posts(still looking for a reason why u hide urself)

karthik said...

so hows the response to Her royal Highness priya now :P ???

Devidas said...

to all readers of priya's blog ad to priya herself
merry x'mas and a happy new year

Anonymous said...

nice topic to write upon

but get to know one thing
u felt like writinng down all these stuff coz u felt it for the first time in your life

understand one thing there are guys who have been suffering from this for years
its got something to do with the way one thinks about matters much more than what others think or do

for me loneliness is something much more enjoyable than for most of you guys coz its something i accepted as a way of living

so dont be too bored and when u feel too bored start chasing someone around the class



Devidas said...

put up something on xmas celeb dear